I have been wanting to write more articles about the spiritual side of pole dance fitness and all it has to offer. This is a deep topic and not one easy to write about because I was never sure where to start. Today, after having a bad emotional episode I realized where to start. I hate to say it, but sometimes feeling like you’ve hit “bottom” emotionally can really help you get going again in the right direction.
I don’t know about you, but for me, many times I approach my pole dancing with an expectation that I need to get something from it. For example, when I pole dance, I want to FEEL like I got a workout, so I can stay lean and look my best for the upcoming summer.
Other subconscious expectations include, increased flexibility, a more positive attitude, the approval of my fans, etc. You know them, if you look inside yourself, you will find your own expectations. For some of you it’s looking sexy for your man and for others it boils down to a fun way to lose weight.
Whatever your reasons are, it’s an expectation to get something from your pole dancing.
What if I told you that you’re potentially setting yourself up for failure by doing that?
What if there is more to dance than “getting something” from it?
Dance goes back prior to biblical times. It’s seated in all cultures and for a good reason. Many fads and practices come and go in various cultures, but dance remains……… because it’s more than just “dance”.
Pole dancing for fitness or for ANY reason has the power to allow you to remember your inner “love flow”.
AND, did you know that your expectations can cut you off from that spiritual flow?
Getting back to my story so you can see my point here, I hit an emotional bottom. It’s happened to me multiple times and for those of you following me, you know that I struggle with Hypothyroidism which can leave me in the throws of depression.
It really doesn’t matter how you hit an emotional bottom, the point is that you know when you are there. Life feels like @$#%! When you are feeling down you may not be able to find the motivation to get on the pole and dance. Even if you’re not on bottom, you may find that sometimes it’s just hard to get on the pole dance like you know you love to and you know you can.
This made me wonder…… WTF is my problem? And I realized that the PROBLEM was my problem.
After hitting bottom and coming back out of it so many times, I saw a pattern……. a “love flow” pattern I want to share with now.
Expectations can bring problems to dancing. It’s not that it’s bad to want to lose weight or look sexy for your boyfriend at all, however, when out of balance those expectations can kill a valuable jem you may not know you already have inside you at this very moment, a jem just waiting to sparkle.
One of the expectations that stunted my ability to get back on the pole and dance was the expectation to lose weight (common problem I know). When I wasn’t getting the weight loss results I wanted through dance I started to think, “well what’s the point in dancing? I’m not going to lose weight anyway!”
We all have our hang ups. For others it might look like this “why bother trying, I’m so strapped for time and my kids won’t leave me alone!”
Whatever your reason, I would like to invite you to drop ALL your expectations in your pole dancing workout (for now – you can take them back later if you want).
Now that the expectations are gone for this moment in time, now allow yourself to disengage from any feelings or “right” or “wrong”. After all, they aren’t helping you, are they? And who made those rules anyway?
Now in this space with NO expectations without any “right” or “wrong” judgements against yourself, allow yourself to relax into the idea of pole dancing. As you grab a hold of the dance pole, allow your body to move as a GIFT to the dance. Allow your body to have a voice and a freedom of moment in a loving way and just BE.
Rest in that love, flow with it, ALLOW the inner soul part of you to SHOW YOU how to move. All it needs is your permission. If you judge, you take away that permission because you are making the rules again and taking away the inspiration your soul could show you. When you do this, don’t judge what happens either…. If you feel like crying, cry, if you feel like jumping for joy, do it – THERE IS NO RIGHT OR WRONG.
The love flow is just being and allowing ALL emotional energies, not just he good ones!
Will you pole dancing today and give your body permission to express what it wants without judgement just because you can?
For me, it’s easiest to practice this alone when nobody is watching. Why? Because I might cry or do something weird. People judge, it’s human nature and when you are trying to enter a space of no judgement, it’s hard enough to get ourselves to stop criticizing ourselves! Removing other people in the room makes things easier.
Practicing the love flow while pole dancing has changed my life, increased my motivation, increased my ability to feel sexy and confident, and removed negative emotional obstacles. I believe it can do the same for you…….. if you allow it.
So, give the “love flow” a try and please comment below and let me know how it goes : )